For those of you who want to know how the saga has gone. Husband is not sorry for the way he treated me. I started to go buy groceries today and I realized he left 4 empty scuba tanks in my car. They had to be returned today or I would have had to pay for another days rent on them he never said a word about it. It is across town to return these tanks he works on that side of town and he needed to drop off his tanks to have them refilled he just did that to spite me. When I got to the shop one of the guys said "it is not to often you see a lady hauling tanks like that". Yes I am aware most women who dive usually dive with a mate who cares enough not to make them haul around these tanks, Kudos’s to you gals who do! Just so you know he has never done this before. We have been married 22 years in the middle of my life I end up with the jerk of the year. I think our traveling days are over.We have never traveled together well on our honeymoon he slapped me so hard in my face half my lip was bruised for a week. I must mention we were both drinking but I know that is no excuse to ever hit anyone. He kept slapping me for the next year always apologetic. He may have slapped me maybe 3 or 4 more times then he just stopped he never hit me again. He said he quit because he knew I would leave him. He was right I would have. Now I tell him if he ever lays another hand on me be prepared to be arrested I will press charges. He is moody and mean and he likes to drink on the weekends. I mean drink until he is stupid drunk. Most of the time I stay out of his way and he leaves me alone. I know you are wondering why are you still married to this guy good question. I don’t like the idea of divorce and I know there is not magical marriage. His good qualities are he works and helps with the bills. He will do some housework no much but he does cut our big yard yes I know things I can manage on my own. I know one day he will walk out the door he already has one time it is bound to happen again. Until then I sit on my hands and wait for the day. I could leave but for the past 3 years my mother has been living with us she built herself an apartment onto our house with her own money she is no problem her health is good and she minds her own business. I am a only child and she has nowhere else to go. I figure if I wait it out he will leave. He behaves as if he is miserable here I am wondering why he is still here. I work and pay half the bills and do the majority of the housework and I cook maybe I need to stop all those things. Oh well only time will tell will he leave or will he get better hmmmmm yes I know 99% chance he will not get better.Who believes in miracles?
No thankfully we have no children. He just informed me to never speak to him again and proceeded to call me a bit**. I told him I have no idea why he is so angry with me and after 22 years I deserve an answer he refused.
I failed to mention he never hit me again after the first year he didn’t have to. I know he could if he wanted to.

It would really help you to have some therapy. You don’t have to remain miserable or in a state like you are in forever. You don’t have to keep wondering either.

Just get some counseling and it will change your life.

The chances of him changing ? Hardly ever. The chances of you finding ways to cope ? Wonderful